TRANSCRIBED FROM THE BAXTER BULLETIN MAY 17, 1918 P. 3
The Kaiser called the devil up
The telephone one day
The girl at central listened
To what they had to say.
Hello! she heard the Kaiser’s voice
Is old man satan at home?
Just tell him it’s Kaiser Bill
That wants him on the phone.
And the devil said hello to Bill
And Bill said how are you
I can hear a hell on earth
So tell me what to do.
What can I do the devil said
My dear old Kaiser Bill
If there’s a thing that I can do
To help you sure I will.
The Kaiser said now listen
And I will try to tell
The way that I am running
On earth a modern hell.
My army went through Belgium
Shooting women and children down
We tore up all the country
And blew up all her towns.
My zeppelins dropped bombs on cities
Killing both old and young
And those the zeppelins didn’t get
Were taken out and hung.
I started out for Paris
With the aid of poisonous gas
The Belgiums and English stopped us
And wouldn’t let us pass.
My submarines are devils,
Why you should see them fight
They go sneaking through the sea
And sink a ship at night.
I was running things to suit me
Till a year or so ago
When a man called Woodrow Wilson
Wrote me to go more slow.
He said to me dear William
We don’t want to make you sore
So be sure to tell your U-boats
To sink our ships no more.
We have told you the last time
So dear Bill it’s up to you
And if you do not stop it
You’ll have us to fight too.
Now that’s why I called you satan
For I want advice from you
I knew that you would tell me
Just what I ought to do.
My dear old Kaiser William
There’s not much for me to tell
For the Yanks will make it hotter
Than I can for you in hell.
I’ve been a mean old devil
But not half so mean as you
And the minute you get here
I’ll give my job to you.
I’ll be ready for your coming
I’ll keep the fires all bright
I’ll have your rooms all ready
When the Yanks begin to fight.
The boys in blue will get you
I have nothing more to tell
Hang up the phone and get your hat
And meet me here in hell.
Joseph L Adams
NOTES: This poem was originally published in the Stone County Record. Joseph Leander Adams was born on January 9, 1889 in Mountain View, Arkansas and died on January 3, 1925 in Mountain View. He is buried in the Flatwood Cemetery in Mountain View. He departed August 26, 1918 in the 312th Sanitary Train and retuned January 22, 1919, with Base Hospital 111.
TRANSCRIBED BY CAROLYN YANCEY KENT
The Kaiser called the devil up
The telephone one day
The girl at central listened
To what they had to say.
Hello! she heard the Kaiser’s voice
Is old man satan at home?
Just tell him it’s Kaiser Bill
That wants him on the phone.
And the devil said hello to Bill
And Bill said how are you
I can hear a hell on earth
So tell me what to do.
What can I do the devil said
My dear old Kaiser Bill
If there’s a thing that I can do
To help you sure I will.
The Kaiser said now listen
And I will try to tell
The way that I am running
On earth a modern hell.
My army went through Belgium
Shooting women and children down
We tore up all the country
And blew up all her towns.
My zeppelins dropped bombs on cities
Killing both old and young
And those the zeppelins didn’t get
Were taken out and hung.
I started out for Paris
With the aid of poisonous gas
The Belgiums and English stopped us
And wouldn’t let us pass.
My submarines are devils,
Why you should see them fight
They go sneaking through the sea
And sink a ship at night.
I was running things to suit me
Till a year or so ago
When a man called Woodrow Wilson
Wrote me to go more slow.
He said to me dear William
We don’t want to make you sore
So be sure to tell your U-boats
To sink our ships no more.
We have told you the last time
So dear Bill it’s up to you
And if you do not stop it
You’ll have us to fight too.
Now that’s why I called you satan
For I want advice from you
I knew that you would tell me
Just what I ought to do.
My dear old Kaiser William
There’s not much for me to tell
For the Yanks will make it hotter
Than I can for you in hell.
I’ve been a mean old devil
But not half so mean as you
And the minute you get here
I’ll give my job to you.
I’ll be ready for your coming
I’ll keep the fires all bright
I’ll have your rooms all ready
When the Yanks begin to fight.
The boys in blue will get you
I have nothing more to tell
Hang up the phone and get your hat
And meet me here in hell.
Joseph L Adams
NOTES: This poem was originally published in the Stone County Record. Joseph Leander Adams was born on January 9, 1889 in Mountain View, Arkansas and died on January 3, 1925 in Mountain View. He is buried in the Flatwood Cemetery in Mountain View. He departed August 26, 1918 in the 312th Sanitary Train and retuned January 22, 1919, with Base Hospital 111.
TRANSCRIBED BY CAROLYN YANCEY KENT